第30部分(第5/9 頁)

efore　her。

Was　it　wonderful　after　all？

But　no……she　refused　it。

〃Whatever　it　may　pretend　to　mean；　what　it　is　is　a　silly

absurd　toy…lamb　with　a　Christmas…tree　flag　ledged　on　its

paw……and　if　it　wants　to　mean　anything　else；　it　must　look

different　from　that。〃

He　was　in　a　state　of　violent　irritation　against　her。　Partly

he　was　ashamed　of　his　love　for　these　things；　he　hid　his　passion

for　them。　He　was　ashamed　of　the　ecstasy　into　which　he　could

throw　himself　with　these　symbols。　And　for　a　few　moments　he　hated

the　lamb　and　the　mystic　pictures　of　the　Eucharist；　with　a

violent；　ashy　hatred。　His　fire　was　put　out；　she　had　thrown　cold

water　on　it。　The　whole　thing　was　distasteful　to　him；　his　mouth

was　full　of　ashes。　He　went　out　cold　with　corpse…like　anger；

leaving　her　alone。　He　hated　her。　He　walked　through　the　white

snow；　under　a　sky　of　lead。

And　she　wept　again；　in　bitter　recurrence　of　the　previous

gloom。　But　her　heart　was　easy……oh；　much　more　easy。

She　ake　it　up　with　him　when　he　came

home　again。　He　was　black　and　surly；　but　abated。　She　had　broken　a

little　of　something　in　him。　And　at　length　he　was　glad　to　forfeit

from　his　soul　all　his　symbols；　to　have　her　making　love　to　him。

He　loved　it　when　she　put　her　head　on　his　knee；　and　he　had　not

asked　her　to　or　wanted　her　to；　he　loved　her　when　she　put　her

arms　round　him　and　made　bold